Bimwe mu byabangamira umubano wanyu n'uko mwabikosora

Mu mibanire ya buri munsi haba ku bashakanye cyangwa se abakundana, siko buri gihe ibintu bihora bimeze neza. Habaho igihe ibintu bigenda nabi, kubera impamvu imwe cya nwa nyinshi, nyamara umwanzuro si ukwemerera ibyo bibazo guhungabanya umubano ahubwo icya ngombwa ni ukurebera hamwe uko ikibazo cyavutse cyakemuka

Muri iyi nkuru tugiye kurebera hamwe ibiza ku isonga mu gutera ibibazo mu mubano, ndetse n’uburyo bwagakoreshejwe mu kubikemura.

1. Intonganya

Ntabwo bizabaho ko ikintu cyose mucyumvikanaho, ahubwo rimwe na rimwe hazajya habaho kudahuza, ndetse bishoboke ko hanabaho kuvuga nabi no kurakaranya. Mushobora gupfa amafaranga, gutinda gutaha, gutinda guteka, n’ibindi mutumvikanyeho. Ibi kubyirinda hakiri kare ni ukwiha umurongo ubireba hakiri kare, gutanga amakuru ku gihe mu gihe hari impinduka ibaye wenda ku masaha usanzwe utahira, … Kandi igihe bibayeho mukaganira uwakosheje ntabe udakorwaho ahubwo agaca bugufi akemera ikosa, uwakosherejwe na we ntabigire intambara cyane, kuko amahane ntakemura ikibazo kurenza amahoro

2. Gutanga amakuru

Nkuko tumaze kubivuga hejuru, gutanga amakuru ku gihe, kubwirana uko umunsi wagenze, ibibazo wahuye na byo… Kimwe mu bituma uwo mwashakanye/mukundana akwibazaho akayoberwa ibyawe ni ukutamuvugisha, kutamuganiriza kuko ashobora no kubibonamo ko utakimukeneye cyangwa se amakuru utamuha hari undi usigaye uyaha. Ni byiza kuganira kuri buri kimwe kibareba, gutanga amakuru ku gihe, gusabana haba kuri terefoni, muri kumwe se, … Ikiruta byose umenye icyo ugomba kuvuga n’igihe ukivugamo

3. Guhemuka

Nubwo ushobora kubabarirwa nyuma yo guca inyuma uwo mwashakanye ariko biragoye kuba wakongera kugirirwa icyizere nka mbere. Ntabwo kenshi bibaho bitunguranye, nubwo bishoboka, ahubwo ni ibintu bitwara igihe, kubipanga byaba igihe n’ahantu bizabera. Niba wananiwe kubihisha ugafatwa, ca bugufi usabe imbabazi kandi ugaragaze guhinduka ku buryo bwose bushoboka. Gusa inama isumba izindi ni ukwirinda mu buryo bwose bushoboka kuba wahemukira uwo mwashakanye

4. Ihungabana

Iri ni ihungabana mu ntekererezo ariko ritaturutse ku wo mwashakanye/uwo mukundana. Ushobora kuba ubangamiwe ku kazi, kuba ufite ibibazo aho uvuka, kuba ufite ibibazo by’ubukungu, hamwe usanga byakurenze bikaza guhungabanya umubano wanyu.

Ibi kubyirinda ni ukutihererana ibibazo, kudahisha uwo mwashakanye/mukundana akabazo kose waba wahuye na ko kuko nubwo atagufasha ugacyemura ariko byibuze amenya uko iyo minsi akwitwaraho, amagambo akubwira, ayo yirinda…

5. Imibonano

Uwo mwashakanye ashobora kuba ahora yifuza imibonano mu gihe wowe umeze nk’aho wayizinutswe. Ushobora no kuba wowe wumva uyishaka rimwe mu cyumweru we ashaka byibuze buri munsi. Aha rero hatabayeho kubiganiraho hashobora kuzamo gushwana cyangwa se guhemukirana kandi iki ni ikibazo cyoroshye. Ku muntu mukundana, kwihanganirana no kumvikana biza ku isonga. Niba mudahuza ubushake, mushobora gushyiraho igihe cyo muzajya mubikoramo, iminsi n’amasaha. Bituma habaho guhuza, ndetse kuko muba muzi neza umunsi muzabikoreraho, mwembi mukitegura mu mutwe, ku buryo mu mubiri biri bworohe. Ihame ariko si uguhana igihe, mwanashaka ubundi buryo mwumvikana, ariko ntibihungabanye umubano wanyu

6. Ubutunzi

Byibuze buri joro, urugo rumwe mu ngo 10, bashwana bapfa imitungo. Ni umubare utari muto, buri munsi. Bivuze ko buri rugo byibuze rimwe mu buzima bagira igihe bapfa ibyerekeye imitungo. Umuti ni uwuhe? Ni byiza kuganira mweruye ku ikoreshwa ry’amafaranga. Niba hari ukora undi adakora, ntiyumve ko umutungo ari uwe awukoresha uko ashaka ahubwo ni uwo musangiye keretse mu gihe mwumvikanye ko buri wese yigenga ku mutungo we. Mu gihe bibashobokeye, mwumvikane umubare runaka buri umwe yemerewe gukoresha uko abyumva (gutembera, gusengera, kwidagadura, …) ariko munumvikane ku mikoreshereze yawo muri rusange. Ibi bizabarinda

7. Imiryango

Byaba kubafasha, ababasura bakahatinda se, abo mucumbikira biga, bashaka akazi se, ni bimwe mu bishobora kuzana agatotsi mu muryango. Nyamara nanone si ko byakagenze ahubwo byakabaye byiza mugiye mubiganiraho mugafatanya gufata umwanzuro. Si ihame ngo nimuha igihumbi hamwe n’abandi mukibahe, kuko siko banganyije kugikenera, ahubwo icyo gihumbi mwacyumvikanyeho cyangwa ubikoze kuko ari iwanyu, bene wanyu? Ese uwo munyeshuri wiga ataha aho, mbere yuko aza mwabiganiriyeho cyangwa waramubwiye uti wa murumuna wanjye azajya yiga aba hano, mbese nk’itangazo gusa? Kubiganiraho ni byo byiza kandi birafasha

Si ibi gusa nawe uzi ibindi bishobora kuba bikubangamira. Ni byiza kwicara mukabiganiraho, hatajemo kwikuza no kwikunda, ni bwo umubano wanyu uzarushaho kugenda neza mu buzima bwanyu bwa buri munsi.