Mu mico yose n’ibihugu byinshi hagaragaza yuko umugore ari we shingiro ry’urugo ruzima, urugo rugendwa ndetse n’iterambere ryarwo. Nubwo umugabo ari we muyobozi warwo, ariko abanyarwanda barayamaze bati ukurusha umugore akurusha urugo.
Ndetse n’abasoma bibiliya mu Imigani ya Salomo harimo imirongo imwe igaragaza ko kugira umugore mwiza ari ikintu cyiza.
Nkuko mu nkuru zatambutse twerekanye imico ikwiye kuranga umugabo mwiza reka noneho nkuko twabisezeranye tuvuge ku mico yagakwiye kuranga umugore mwiza
Ese ukunda umugabo wawe? Wumva wishimira kuba uri kumwe na we haba mu rugo cyangwa aho mugenda hose? Ibuka ko ari we mubana kandi muzabana ubuzima bwose ushigaje kuri iyi si. Kumukunda si ukubimubwira ahubwo bimugaragarize, abibone abyishimire. Hari byinshi wakora mu kurumugaragariza nko kumutegurira ifunguro akunda, kumuhobera cyangwa kumusoma agiye cyangwa avuye ku kazi, n’ibindi wamukorera bimwereka ko akwizihiye
Ikintu cya mbere kijya kiba ipfundo ryo kubana neza ni umushyikirano mu rugo. Kuganira kuri aka na kariya, kujya inama kuri buri kimwe kibera mu rugo, kumubwira ibyo utekereza cyangwa wifuza…
Ibuka ko umugabo wawe atareba mu bwonko ahubwo ibitekerezo byawe usabwa kubivuga ibyo umunenga ukabimubwira ndetse ukamwereka uburyo wifuza ko byakagenze mugafatanya kubikosora
Nibyo koko ku mpande zose umugabo n’umugore babereyeho gufashanya kuri buri kimwe. Ntabwo bivuze kumufasha mu bibazo n’ibihe bigoye gusa, ahubwo ni ukumufasha muri byose, kumushyigikira no kumutera inkunga gusa bidakuyeho kumwereka aho bikosamye cyangwa aho afite intege nke kugirango ahongera ingufu
Iyo umugabo n’umugore ari inshuti urugo rwabo ruraryoha. Hari bamwe babana kubera izindi mpamvu ariko iyo ubanye n’uwo mukundana nta cyiza nka byo. Abakundana babana batishishanya kandi bakabana mu munezero
Ntabwo bikunze kubaho ko wabona umuntu uteye uko ushaka 100%. ahubwo usanga hari imwe mu mico afite udashima kandi ugasanga bigoye ko yayireka nyamara ikaba itabangamiye iterambere ry’urugo. Aha rero umugore mwiza amenya kuhitwara gitwari. Si byiza kugaya umugabo wawe muri rubanda kuko ntacyo bikosora ahubwo menya ibanga ry’urugo no kwakira umugabo wawe. Kumuconshomera, kumutuka, si ibintu by’I Rwanda.
Si ngombwa ngo ukunde bimwe n’umugabo wawe. Ahubwo wowe menya ngo umugabo wanjye akunda iki n’iki. Menya umukino akunda, film akunda kureba, imyidagaduro akunda, mbese ube uzi ngo umugabo wanjye akunda ikintu runaka. Aha bifasha kutabipfa dore ko hari n’ababyuka igicuku bagiye kureba umupira kubera ko nyine bawukunda.
Soma hano Imico yagakwiye kuranga umugabo mwiza
Ikini ikintu benshi batumva ntibanakivugeho rumwe nyamara buri wese agira igihe akenera cyo kuba mu bye yaba wenyine cyangwa n’abandi. Usanga abagabo bagira byinshi bishimira kandi bakanezezwa no kubikora bisanzuye. Kureba umupira, kuwukina se, gusangira agacupa n’abandi bagabo (kuri ubu byahawe akabyiniriro k’umugoroba w’abapapa). umugore mwiza aha umugabo we umwanya wo kujya mu bimushimisha, bipfa kuba gusa bitabangamiye inyungu z’urugo.
Mu mushyikirano wose hakenerwa kumva no kumvwa. Rero kumva si ugutega amatwi gusa ahubwo harimo no gusobanukirwa ibyo ubwiwe no kubishyira mu bikorwa. Niba umugabo ari kumubwira, ntamujambuza cyangwa ngo ahugire mu bindi (ngaho filimi se, terefoni za whatsapp na za facebook…) ahubwo akurikira yitonze ikiganiro uko kimeze.
Niba umugabo ari kukubwira zimya TV ushyire ku ruhande terefoni ugabanye umuziki umutege amatwi. Ni icyubahiro akwiye nk’uwo mubana kandi nawe iyo wubashye urubahwa. Kandi kumwumva ntibivuze buri gihe kwemera ibyo avuze ariko se ni gute wavuguruza ibyo utumvise?
Abagabo nabo ni abantu. Akeneye nawe gushimwa iyo yakoze iby’indashyikirwa kandi niyo yaba yakoze ibiri mu nshingano ze, ni byiza kugira umutima ushima.
Niyo yakugurira unite zo guhamagara, kuki utamushimira? Niyo yakugurira igitenge ubuzwa n’iki gushima? Ni inshingano ze kukwambika, ariko ibuka ko hari n’abatabikora.
Ubupfura n’ubunyangamugayo ni ishingiro ry’urugo rwiza. Ingo ziramba usanga zirangwa no kuganira, kubwizanya ukuri, guca bugufi no kwihangana. Umugabo wawe akeneye umugore umubwiza ukuri kandi w’inyangamugayo. Niyo we yaba atari ko ameze, wowe kora uruhande rwawe
Ni byiza ko mu buzima bwo mu rugo mudahora ibintu byose mwabikomeje. Haba igihe hakenerwa guseka, gukina, kwishima ku mpande zombi. Iyo ibintu bihora ari bimwe buri gihe birarambirana. Gutembera bya hato na hato, guhindura ibintu uko byari bisanzwe, mu rwego rwo gutebya na byo birakenerwa mu rugo
Soma hano Iyi niyo mico ikwiye kuranga umugabo/umugore mwiza
Ndetse n’abasoma bibiliya mu Imigani ya Salomo harimo imirongo imwe igaragaza ko kugira umugore mwiza ari ikintu cyiza.
Ubonye umugore mwiza aba abonye ikintu cyiza, Akaba agize umugisha ahawe n’Uwiteka (Imigani 18:22)
Nkuko mu nkuru zatambutse twerekanye imico ikwiye kuranga umugabo mwiza reka noneho nkuko twabisezeranye tuvuge ku mico yagakwiye kuranga umugore mwiza
Agaragaza urukundo
Ese ukunda umugabo wawe? Wumva wishimira kuba uri kumwe na we haba mu rugo cyangwa aho mugenda hose? Ibuka ko ari we mubana kandi muzabana ubuzima bwose ushigaje kuri iyi si. Kumukunda si ukubimubwira ahubwo bimugaragarize, abibone abyishimire. Hari byinshi wakora mu kurumugaragariza nko kumutegurira ifunguro akunda, kumuhobera cyangwa kumusoma agiye cyangwa avuye ku kazi, n’ibindi wamukorera bimwereka ko akwizihiye
Ashyikirana n’umugabo we
Ikintu cya mbere kijya kiba ipfundo ryo kubana neza ni umushyikirano mu rugo. Kuganira kuri aka na kariya, kujya inama kuri buri kimwe kibera mu rugo, kumubwira ibyo utekereza cyangwa wifuza…
Ibuka ko umugabo wawe atareba mu bwonko ahubwo ibitekerezo byawe usabwa kubivuga ibyo umunenga ukabimubwira ndetse ukamwereka uburyo wifuza ko byakagenze mugafatanya kubikosora
Ni umufasha
Nibyo koko ku mpande zose umugabo n’umugore babereyeho gufashanya kuri buri kimwe. Ntabwo bivuze kumufasha mu bibazo n’ibihe bigoye gusa, ahubwo ni ukumufasha muri byose, kumushyigikira no kumutera inkunga gusa bidakuyeho kumwereka aho bikosamye cyangwa aho afite intege nke kugirango ahongera ingufu
Abera umugabo we inshuti
Iyo umugabo n’umugore ari inshuti urugo rwabo ruraryoha. Hari bamwe babana kubera izindi mpamvu ariko iyo ubanye n’uwo mukundana nta cyiza nka byo. Abakundana babana batishishanya kandi bakabana mu munezero
Kumwubaha uko ari
Ntabwo bikunze kubaho ko wabona umuntu uteye uko ushaka 100%. ahubwo usanga hari imwe mu mico afite udashima kandi ugasanga bigoye ko yayireka nyamara ikaba itabangamiye iterambere ry’urugo. Aha rero umugore mwiza amenya kuhitwara gitwari. Si byiza kugaya umugabo wawe muri rubanda kuko ntacyo bikosora ahubwo menya ibanga ry’urugo no kwakira umugabo wawe. Kumuconshomera, kumutuka, si ibintu by’I Rwanda.
Amenya ibyo umugabo we akunda
Si ngombwa ngo ukunde bimwe n’umugabo wawe. Ahubwo wowe menya ngo umugabo wanjye akunda iki n’iki. Menya umukino akunda, film akunda kureba, imyidagaduro akunda, mbese ube uzi ngo umugabo wanjye akunda ikintu runaka. Aha bifasha kutabipfa dore ko hari n’ababyuka igicuku bagiye kureba umupira kubera ko nyine bawukunda.
Soma hano Imico yagakwiye kuranga umugabo mwiza
Amenya ko umugabo akeneye akanya
Ikini ikintu benshi batumva ntibanakivugeho rumwe nyamara buri wese agira igihe akenera cyo kuba mu bye yaba wenyine cyangwa n’abandi. Usanga abagabo bagira byinshi bishimira kandi bakanezezwa no kubikora bisanzuye. Kureba umupira, kuwukina se, gusangira agacupa n’abandi bagabo (kuri ubu byahawe akabyiniriro k’umugoroba w’abapapa). umugore mwiza aha umugabo we umwanya wo kujya mu bimushimisha, bipfa kuba gusa bitabangamiye inyungu z’urugo.
8. Arumva
Mu mushyikirano wose hakenerwa kumva no kumvwa. Rero kumva si ugutega amatwi gusa ahubwo harimo no gusobanukirwa ibyo ubwiwe no kubishyira mu bikorwa. Niba umugabo ari kumubwira, ntamujambuza cyangwa ngo ahugire mu bindi (ngaho filimi se, terefoni za whatsapp na za facebook…) ahubwo akurikira yitonze ikiganiro uko kimeze.
Niba umugabo ari kukubwira zimya TV ushyire ku ruhande terefoni ugabanye umuziki umutege amatwi. Ni icyubahiro akwiye nk’uwo mubana kandi nawe iyo wubashye urubahwa. Kandi kumwumva ntibivuze buri gihe kwemera ibyo avuze ariko se ni gute wavuguruza ibyo utumvise?
Arashimira
Abagabo nabo ni abantu. Akeneye nawe gushimwa iyo yakoze iby’indashyikirwa kandi niyo yaba yakoze ibiri mu nshingano ze, ni byiza kugira umutima ushima.
Niyo yakugurira unite zo guhamagara, kuki utamushimira? Niyo yakugurira igitenge ubuzwa n’iki gushima? Ni inshingano ze kukwambika, ariko ibuka ko hari n’abatabikora.
10. Ni umunyakuri
Ubupfura n’ubunyangamugayo ni ishingiro ry’urugo rwiza. Ingo ziramba usanga zirangwa no kuganira, kubwizanya ukuri, guca bugufi no kwihangana. Umugabo wawe akeneye umugore umubwiza ukuri kandi w’inyangamugayo. Niyo we yaba atari ko ameze, wowe kora uruhande rwawe
Agira igisa n’urwenya
Ni byiza ko mu buzima bwo mu rugo mudahora ibintu byose mwabikomeje. Haba igihe hakenerwa guseka, gukina, kwishima ku mpande zombi. Iyo ibintu bihora ari bimwe buri gihe birarambirana. Gutembera bya hato na hato, guhindura ibintu uko byari bisanzwe, mu rwego rwo gutebya na byo birakenerwa mu rugo
Umugore nk’uwo uzamurambeho.
Soma hano Iyi niyo mico ikwiye kuranga umugabo/umugore mwiza
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